The Evolving Rituals of Death: A Shared Human Experience Beyond Belief

Death, whether we acknowledge it or avoid it, is the great equalizer. Regardless of our beliefs—be they rooted in faith, spirituality, or a more secular worldview—death touches us all. In recent years, the ways in which we respond to death in the United States have shifted significantly, reflecting broader societal trends. Whether religious or non-religious, whether certain of an afterlife or not, Americans are increasingly participating in new and evolving death rituals. These changes offer a fascinating look into how, regardless of our belief systems, we are collectively reshaping how we approach the end of life.

1. A Nation Moving Away from Organized Religion

One of the most notable trends influencing American death practices is the growing number of people who identify as religiously unaffiliated. According to a 2021 survey by the Pew Research Center, nearly 30% of American adults now identify as “nones”—a term used to describe those who are atheist, agnostic, or unaffiliated with any particular religious tradition. This is a sharp rise from 16% in 2007. Among these individuals, many still seek meaning and connection in moments of loss, despite not subscribing to a traditional belief in God or an afterlife.

For agnostics, the question of what lies beyond death remains open-ended. There may be a higher power, or there may not be. But what is clear is that we all must face the death of loved ones, and ultimately, our own. Whether or not one believes in eternal life, the desire to commemorate those who have passed is universal.

As organized religious funerals decline, we see a rise in secular or personalized ceremonies. Rather than focusing on doctrines of salvation or eternal punishment, these ceremonies are rooted in the celebration of the individual life. The increasing preference for celebrations of life over traditional funerals is a direct reflection of this shift. According to the National Funeral Directors Association (NFDA), over 51% of Americans now express a preference for a personalized memorial service or a celebration of life, rather than a traditional, religious funeral.

2. The Growing Appeal of Spirituality Without Religion

While many Americans are stepping away from organized religion, this doesn’t mean that all have abandoned spirituality. There is a growing segment of the population that identifies as “spiritual but not religious” (SBNR), blending a reverence for nature, personal growth, and connection to something greater than themselves—without necessarily believing in a deity. According to the Pew Research Center, 27% of U.S. adults describe themselves as spiritual but not religious.

For this group, death is often viewed through the lens of nature’s cycle. There is comfort in the idea that life and death are simply parts of a greater continuum, and that in death, we return to the earth. This belief is reflected in the increasing popularity of green burials—a practice where the body is returned to the earth in the most natural way possible, without embalming fluids or concrete vaults. Green burials emphasize environmental sustainability, and for many, they are a way to honor both the deceased and the planet.

In 2022, the NFDA reported that 72% of Americans are open to the idea of green burials, with 53% expressing specific interest in environmentally friendly options. For those who are spiritual but not religious, the connection between nature and death provides a sense of continuity, one that transcends religious doctrines of heaven or hell.

3. Cremation: A Rising Choice for All Beliefs

Cremation, once a controversial option among certain religious traditions, has become the most popular method of body disposition in the United States. In 2022, nearly 60% of Americans chose cremation, up from 27% in 2001. This number is projected to rise to nearly 80% by 2040, according to the Cremation Association of North America (CANA).

Whether for religious, spiritual, or purely practical reasons, cremation is appealing to a wide range of people. For those who believe in an afterlife, cremation is simply a way to return the body to the earth quickly. For agnostics or non-believers, cremation often reflects a pragmatic approach—ashes can be scattered in meaningful places, allowing for personal rituals that feel more intimate and less bound by tradition.

As a practice, cremation offers a flexibility that traditional burial does not. Families can choose to scatter ashes in places that were meaningful to the deceased, be it a mountain, the ocean, or a favorite park. In this way, cremation aligns with both secular and spiritual approaches to death, providing a neutral ground for families with diverse beliefs to come together and honor their loved one.

4. A Collective Shift Toward Personalization

One of the most significant shifts in modern American death practices is the movement toward personalized, non-traditional memorials. Regardless of one’s belief in the afterlife, people are increasingly choosing to memorialize their loved ones in ways that reflect their personalities, passions, and relationships rather than through rigid, religious scripts.

The NFDA reports that millennials and Generation Xers are more likely to opt for personalized memorials that focus on the individual’s life and accomplishments, often featuring multimedia elements like video tributes, photo slideshows, and favorite music. These personalized ceremonies are held in a variety of settings—outdoor gardens, beaches, family homes—moving away from the traditional church or funeral home services that dominated previous generations.

Even those who identify as religious are increasingly drawn to these personalized celebrations. This points to a broader cultural trend: we are less interested in the promise of an afterlife and more focused on celebrating the time we spent with those we have lost. In this way, agnostics, atheists, the spiritual-but-not-religious, and believers alike are participating in new, shared rituals that place the individual’s life at the center of the mourning process.

5. The Role of Technology in Modern Death Rituals

Another key factor in the transformation of death practices is technology. Whether we believe in God or not, we now live in an era where the internet has become a central part of how we grieve. Social media platforms like Facebook and Instagram allow people to share memories, photos, and messages about their loved ones, creating virtual spaces of remembrance that exist beyond the physical world. In this way, technology has created a new form of immortality—a digital afterlife where memories can be revisited and shared indefinitely.

During the COVID-19 pandemic, many families were unable to gather in person for funerals or memorials, leading to a rise in livestreamed services and virtual gatherings. This practice has continued beyond the pandemic, allowing geographically dispersed families to take part in memorials. Whether religious or not, technology has given people a new way to connect with others in times of grief.

6. Funerals vs. Celebrations of Life: A Shared Experience

Perhaps the most profound transformation in American death practices is the shift from traditional funerals to celebrations of life. Traditional funerals, often somber and ritualistic, focused on the finality of death and, in religious contexts, the promise of an afterlife. In contrast, celebrations of life are more joyful, focusing on the achievements and personality of the deceased. These events encourage laughter, storytelling, and community, often held in places that held special meaning for the individual who passed away.

What’s most interesting about this shift is that it is embraced by both the religious and non-religious. Regardless of whether one believes in heaven, the focus has turned to the life that was lived. It is a rare point of convergence in an otherwise divided culture. In a celebration of life, those who believe in God and those who don’t come together to remember the deceased, reflecting on the impact they had on the world rather than dwelling on what comes next.

Conclusion: Death as a Shared Human Experience

Whether we are believers, agnostics, or atheists, one thing remains true: we are all bound by the reality of death. And as America’s religious landscape changes, so too do our death rituals. What unites us in this new era is not a shared belief in an afterlife, but a shared commitment to honoring the lives of those who have passed in meaningful, personal ways.

As our society moves further from traditional religious practices and embraces more personalized, secular, and nature-focused rituals, we find ourselves participating in a new collective experience. We may not all agree on what happens after death, but we are united in how we commemorate it—by focusing on the life that was lived, the connections that were made, and the impact that endures long after we’re gone.